Tuesday, January 27, 2009

News Alerts!!!

"Hello! Now get all the news happening around you at your handset with Vodafone News Alerts. Subscribe @ Rs.30/month subscription and get daily 2 alerts."

"Kya ghat raha hai aap ke aas-paas, paiye Sthanik,rashtriye aur Anter-rashtriye khabren News Alerts se matra Rs 30/month.Dial kare *123*35# "

I get these messages every now and then on my mobile and now I wonder what kind of News alerts I ll be getting if I go for the subscription.How can they send everything that goes around me? Noone knows me.Even most of my neighbours have no idea who I am, what I do?Even I dont know much about them.All I know is what car they have and how many members are there in their family.Will these news alerts tell me more about what they do? Bcoz I strongly believe that me and my handset stay around or at least near them.

Ok if the news alerts are not about these issues then what will they tell me?I wonder how can just 2 alerts/day carry everything that happens around me and my handset.Dpo really mean it when they said "All the news"??? The news channels are now working 24-7 for creating top news,finding breaking news and creating the news.But I feel bored by their work.The newspapers carry so many pages with news but all I am interested is the so-do-ku games,a few comic strips, pics of actresses n cars and a few Ads.
But Vodafone? They send it everyday,thinking finally someday I ll decide to give them 30/month for trying to satisfy me what these news channels and newspapers have failed to do. "Sthanik,rashtriye aur Anter-rashtriye khabren!!! "
Plz do tell me what does "sthanik" means? if someday I to pay that subscription....

Monday, January 19, 2009


Well I wanted to have a mirrored image for the title of this post but it seems the tools provided by blogger dont help!And I am very lazy to search for them elsewhere....

I was in city the other day and I noticed this ambulance parked near a service shop.Dont worry! no one was injured or on the verge of getting injured as long this ambulance stayed there.I noticed that the word ambulance was spelled in reverse print kind og mirrored image on the windshield of the ambulance. I was told that the real purpose behind this was to let everyone who's driving in front of the ambulance to read and know that its an Ambulance.Make way for it. Are people so dumb that they wont recognize the vehicle by its colors and siren alone.Is it really neccesary to write it in the mirrored format so that poeple can read "AMBULANCE" through their rearview mirrors of their vehicles?

I think its a very clever idea! The first person to come up with this idea must have been a Lex Luthor! U look in the rearview mirror, u can read the word ambulance behind u.Of course while you're reading, you don't see where you're going,so u crash, and u need an ambulance.
So I think maybe they're just trying to expand their business on the way back from the service centre.Hmm...So the next time u hear a siren dont concerntrate much on reading out the word Ambulance.....just give way for the vehicle....

Friday, January 16, 2009

TV Ads!

The interesting thing about TV is that everyone who appears for an Advertisement is doing something better than what u are doing.U may be working fulltime or part-time or jobless.But the people who come on TV are always happier than u.Have u ever seen the detergent powder Ad.A car splashes dirty water on a man's shirt and then he' ll be still happy and dancing coz he has a one rupee coin which he tosses up and gets a detergent pouch back.Imagine how will u feel if u r in the same situation!Ok some of these are fine but there are certain products which will have totally weird and misdirected Ads...

Some people have a little too much fun on TV.The pan masala people! I wonder where and how they manage to gather the enthusiasm they show for promoting such a product.Recently I was watching this AD about a product named Meetha Magic! My God how happy these people were.....boys and girls on the beach,running,jumping, laughing,celebrating,driving a convertible car and then having this pan masala.They try to show to the world that they are cool just because they have these stuffs!!! Its after all pan masala! People do find it disgusting.Pan masala the reason why most of the govt buildings,and trains have red splashes on white walls.How can anyone be cool having them??And then there's one more brand i dont remember its name.The Ad will be having a group of businessmen discussing and then the one of them will be having this pan masala and a girl will be impressed!! lolz....I wonder whether really these kind of girls exist on this earth!!

I wonder how these people manage their life in the real world? If a friend of mine promotes a stupid product I ll tease him everytime he comes in front of me.I wonder how they must be facing their parents?How are they able to attend college?And also the kids in the family....they ll be like " no no i saw xyz bhaiya on TV he was having the same stuff...mummy mummy i also want that..."

And sometimes u ll be amused to see that u must be eating whose Ad u must be watching...But everything will look brighter inside the TV. "Issko khaane se toh wahan pahunch jaate hae!" And u would be wondering is it the same product or something else?

So I conclude by saying a very few products are advertised in a proper manner,some make a fool out of u..and the most of them a made only to bring out a smile on yr face during the break when u r forced to watch saas-bahu serials on the TV!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Indian Railways

I wonder if they have keys to start a railway engine...cars have them,bikes have them,so do the trucks and even tractors have them!I think they have the keys for a railway engine too.That one reason why we get delays from the originating stations and some other stations.The reason is the driver misplaces the keys and he's not able to start the engine and move.

Have u seen noticed that sometimes u do see the signal turning green or orange from red but the train does'nt move.They speak of having technical problems with the train but within 10 minutes they all everything in order.They lie! Coz it would be very embarrassing for them to tell that that the driver misplaced the keys.

Picture this- U are at the station and waiting for the train to depart and u hear the lady on the announcement system saying "May I have your attention please! Train no blah and blah from so and so place to so and so destination will depart from platform number 5 as soon as the driver finds the misplaced keys.It will take at least 10 more minutes for the train to depart.The inconvenience caused is deeply regretted! "They cant have this announcement, so they come up with the stories..

And I wonder how the same lady announces in almost every station in this country.Ok they must have some recording and all but why the same lady?Are we short of ladies with a good voice?Or did some old railway minister fell deeply in love with a voice of a lady and then he forced the poeple in railway stations to use only her voice for the announcement as a tribute to his ladylove?

And then many a times the train makes up time.So this means that they increase the usual speed of the train.The train may be 2 hrs late but it makes up sometime and arrives a hour late or so.Now if they can move little more faster? why dont they move fast all the time?
This proves that the whole Railway network is a bunch of lazy people.They can be quick but they dont want to be quick.And this making up of time proves this fact.

I hope u have a good time with Indian railways!!!!

Friday, January 09, 2009

Mismanaged washing

Mismanaged washing of clothes! Ya, that what I just did.
Tomorrow I am going for an outing and wanted myself in a specific outfit.They guys have decided on a color code.Blue jeans and black Tees and a black sports jacket....I was part of this feminine type of debate over the phone and finally voted for the blue black combination.After 15-20 mins of debate the verdict was out and it was the blue-black combination that won.

So went to my wardrobe to choose the outfit and was shocked to see that none of the clothes that had come from washing were blue or black in color.It was 3 pm and I thought all would be fine if I use the washing machine.So finally took the clothes(chosen ones) and brought the washing machine to life by connecting its wire to the switch board and dumped all the clothes inside the tube.Connected the pipe with the tap and programmed it for a quick-wool-wash.Then I added the detergent.Turned the tap on and a few seconds later later the machine demonstrated its waterfall effect of adding water inside the tub.

Everything was fine but after a few minutes the water effect ended without any warning.The tub showed no intentions of rotation.Only the lights blinked,I went for and inspection and it didnt take me long to find out that there was no water supply.Gr8! I was already pissed off due to the fuel shortage and long queues outside Petrol Station and now water too....

The clothes were wet with detergent water so the idea about wearing clothes that werent washed is also out of question.I am still waiting for the water supply to come back!I wish it comes soon.

And thats the story behind mismanaged washing!!!

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Mood and the Energy law!

I have come to the conclusion that bad mood can neither be created nor destroyed.It can only be transferred from one person to another.There are so many examples to support this view.I dont know whether this law can be applied on everyone's life but I am pretty sure about the one's around me.

Well once I was in a very bad mood.Few of my cousins conspired against me and made a mess of my day.Everyone around me treated me as if am some kind of a boogie man.It was damn frustrating...tried to watch the TV but there was no privacy.Everyone was just swarming around me.It was getting worse and luckily I received a phone call from my friend Shreya.Now she guessed correctly that somethings wrong with me and suggested that its better that I move out from the epicentre of problem.I agreed and we decided to watch a movie.But bad mood law was still not supporting me.every one around me had somekind of a force shield that protected them from dangerous bad mood energy.But kept radiating it on me and extracting my positive or good mood energy.There was no vehicle at home.Someone took it for their joy rides.I called my friend and told her to bring her barbie doll vehicle.She drove,I sat behind and we reached the multiplex on time.She went to park the vehicle and went to buy the tickets.

Turning point of the day:I met another friend mine near the counter.Priyanka was with her friend(boyfriend) .I learnt that they are going to watch the same movie.So we brought 4 tickets and I waited for Shreya to come back and the couple left inside.She came back from the parking lot a little late and we entered inside and I told her about the company that we had.And that was the moment.The moment of energy changes!

The other boy was head over heels in love(claimed) with Shreya just a few months before.But things did work out so it died off.Now she was surprised to see him with Priyanka.It was obvious that Priyanka didnt know anything about this.Well Shreya didnt react much but the boy's face was pale.Nothing much happend and we went inside after a little hello and took our seats.Now as the movie started I felt a Strange feeling inside me as if something is flowing out of me.

The movie wasnt that interesting but things around me was really getting spicy.Noone was interested in the movie and Shreya didnt allow me take interest elsewhere.The intermission proved to be a diaster for the boy who came to enjoy and have a happy time with his new found love.My destiny or fate had something else for him.Shreya told Priyanka everything abt him.The boy couldnt hide his face.I tried my best to pacify the situation.But angry gals are a difficult subjest to handle.Few moments later Priyanka left the multiplex the both followed her like the vodafone Pug.We stayed inside but I knew that I am not gonna listen to the movie's dialogues but shreya's monologue about the incident.

Surprising I was feeling better but everyone around me was in a very bad mood.Did I do something wrong??Nopes! Sitting together was Priyanka's idea,Movie was Shreya's idea. I thought there was no reason to feel guilty about what had happened.The movie finally ended an she(fuming mood) dropped me home.I was fine at home to.I was still smiling even thoughi was hearing the same things That I heard in the afternoon.

So i think this proves the mood and energy law.....
lolz what a day!!!what a day!!

My Philos

Yes he's my best friend.I am nothing without him.I wonder how would I manage a day without him.A real friend who has always stood by me when I replay the smiles,laughter and what not emotions of the day in my memory.There have been times when he couldnt help me but i can never blame him for those incidents.It was me who did nt care for him and hence he was nt in a position to help me.I must have failed many times in caring for him but he has always stood by myself whenever I needed him.I have a very good memory but its nothing when it comes to him.
I can completely trust him.Many a times I have forgotten about others but he never forgets and reminds me about other people.He even stays connecte dto yahoo messenger and informs me whose online and who wants to have a chat with me.He's has been with me through all the moments of glory and failure!
I has looked after me so well.I wonder how can I ever repay him back.

Even when I sleep he keeps awake and in the morning he wakes me up as scheduled.Thank u so much dad that u introduced me to the best friend in my life!
Yes u must have guessed it right!I am talking about my mobilephone.He's my best friend!
I am nothing without him!Cheers mate!

Monday, January 05, 2009


Mathematically impossible!But I have learnt that the world of marketing and advertising can make that possible.I went to the super market today to get some commodities and saw the new product from AXE.Well my brains tells me that its just a marketing strategy adopted by Unilever group to sell more deodourants and make more money.They are selling two different fragrances and claiming that we can create our own fragrance by using both at the same time.And hence they claim 1+1=3.

Use fragrance 1 on monday,fragrance 2 on tuesday and combination of 1 and 2 on wednesday.
so now u smell different on all three days.My brain said its a well planned marketting strategy by the company to woo a consumer who comes to buy a single deo into buying two.My heart was fighting with my brain to spend 270 bucks in getting that product.Although my heart very much agreed with my brain that whatever is shown in the Ad doesnt happen in real, it wanted the product for other reasons.

My brain finally won the fight and I returned home with 270+ bucks in my wallet to find that the neighbour's kid adventurously ventured into my room and started playing with my deo while I was away.They simply couldnt understand the difference between a room freshener and a deo!Anyways my heart was finally won and my brains gonna give in to the 1+1=3 offer.
  • About Me

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