Thursday, September 10, 2009

The Reverse Gear


The Hero Honda Passion made a peculiar sound as the rider applied brakes. Orangee glanced away from his cellphone screen with an expectation. Yes,It was Spiky.

Spiky:- hey! you wont believe whom i saw just now.
There was an excitement in his voice, a joy!
Orangee(smiling) :- i would believe every word of yrs
Spiky:- Boy! she was pissed off i guess, she said she wont talk with me either.
Orangee:- ooh ya??
Spiky:- ya.. spoke something about break-up by association something.
Orangee:- Ok! So Shania will have to choose side now. Us or her...
Spiky: what did u do?What happened??
Orangee :- Well! dont ask... i dont wanna talk abt it..We are late.. lets get going...

7 mins earlier


More Orangee sat on the bus stop bench. He saw a bus approaching the stop. He watched as the driver steered the big vehicle towards left and brought it to a stop.Noone got down,there was noone else in that stop so the Conductor whistled and the bus went away.
"I wish i had waited for the this bus" thought Orangee. He pulled out his Cellphone and started playing Sudoku.

12 mins earlier


More Orangee got down from the bus and stretched his arms and legs.

" Hmm tiring journey huh??"
Orangee turned back to see the source of this familiar voice.
Orangee(surprised): ooh!! Sundae!! hi!.... what are you doing here?
Sundae: U didnt answer my question... and by the way what brings you to this
part of the city?

Orangee: nah nah.. not tiring..40 min ride! I was gonna watch a movie with my
frd.

Sundae: Movie with Shreya... seems interesting..
Orangee: what?? no! no! she isnt coming... were u in the same bus?
Sundae: ooh just shut up. Stop fooling around. I know there's something going on
between
you two.Stop pretending.Why dont you accept the truth?
Orangee: Are you crazy? what are you talking abt? and what if i watch a movie
with her?

Sundae: huh... so u are watching the movie with her.
Orangee: i didnt say that..
Sundae: U just said that... just stop pretending that i still mean a lot to you. i just
saw how much
u love me !How much you care abt me.
Orangee: Listen! i have no idea about what you are talking about?
Sundae: Just stop it.. stop it!!
Orangee: Stop what? This is a stop.. A bus stop.Thats the board.The Driver is
supposed to stop the bus her,I am a Pedestrian.

Sundae: Would you ever take my talks seriously?
Orangee: Listen i am serious! could you please explain what is this all about.You
are the one who
gets angry and doesnt answer my calls for days.
Complete cut off. And now this??

Sundae: Listen i am sick of all this.You are pathetic.There is no use talking to you. I
just wanna
say is Go to hell... I dont wanna talk to you ever. Go watch
movies with as many girls as
you want.
Orangee: Spiky isnt a girl!!
Sundae: Dont interrupt! I am breaking up with you! this is final. U ll never get the
satisfaction of
ignoring my calls and sms and all. Coz i am never ever
gonna call you again.

Orange : Satisfaction of ignoring your calls? wait!!! listen to me... i can explain!!!
Sundae : Its over.. i no longer believe you... stay away from me or i ll call the police
and press
eve-teasing charges on you.

She walked away. Orangee stood there and wondered why the Govt of India didnt make any laws for Adam-Teasing. Afterall there must be many boys like him in this country.

15 mins earlier

Orangee was sat near the window. He felt lucky. He never got seat in public buses and today he got a window seat. A really nice day for him he thought.He felt his cellphone vibrating and pulled it from his jeans pocket. 1 message from Sundae " Hi how are you dear... I was thinking abt us... and i think i was wrong. I believe you now. Orangee smiled reading this. He kept the phone in his pocket and saw scenery outside the window when he sensed his cellphone ringing. He pulled out to see who's calling, but he missed it.It read 1 missed call Sundae 6:30 pm. Orangee made a disgusted face and kept the phone in his pocket. 2 mins later the call came again. He took it out and just when he was about to answer it, the call was disconnected. he kept his phone in the pocket again. The round of missed calls came again and again and everytime Orangee was gonna answer it, it would get disconnected. Orangee switched his phone to offline mode.He saw his stop was coming so he went near the front exit door.

10 mins earlier


Shania: you have plans for this evening?
Orangee: yes! A movie.
Shania: wow! With Sundae?
Orangee: Nopes... she isnt talking yet... I am going with Spiky.
Can i have yr phone..i have to make a call...
Shania: sure! Spiky??
Orangee: ya..

Orangee took the cellphone and made the phone call.

The convo

Orange: heyy! Its me More...
Spiky : listen.. i am stuck...i wont be free till 7..
Orangee :what happened?
Spiky: long story... why dont u take a bus to my place.. i ll pick u up from the stop...
we ll make it on time...
Orangee: alright but listen be there by 7:05. I dont have bal on my phone...
so i wont be able
to
make calls or text you. 7:05 sharp! OK???
Spiky : Roger that! 7:05 pm...
Orangee: see you then...
Spiky: cya..

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Miss You....

Close your eyes and I'll miss you
soon I'll be with you
Remember I'll always be true
And then while I'm away
I'll be there with you in some or the other way
And I'll send all my loving to you
I'll pretend That I'm not in blues
Duration about this has no clues
Still I hope that my dreams will be full of you.....

And then while I'm away
I'll be there with you in some or the other way
And I'll send all my loving to you
All my loving I will send to you
All my loving, darling I'll be true ......

Sunday, August 30, 2009

I dont know what should be the title for this.......

Due to some unavoidable circumstances....
I ll be away from blogs-ville,gtalk facebook and all for a few days..
I am gonna miss you all..
I promise that i will be back soon.

And yes the blog plays a song thats just for you..
Listen to the Beatles singing i want you....
Its my true feelings...

And dont think you are heavy..
Its referring to the time....
She(Time) is so heavy and dense and thick...
At this moment i feel it wont pass away quickly,
But then i recently came to know about the Law of Diminishing marginal utility....
I dont really understand it yet, since you havent explained it..... :D
So it wont be long i guess...
This phase will go away soon... :)


M'ya a lot...... :)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

It must have been love, but its over now !!!



"I still care for you a lot but i am no longer in love with you, I realize we aren't meant for each other "


Now when yr girl comes and speaks these words of wisdom to you, your world comes crashing down around you. Yet you face this terrible blow heroically and walk away... only to get confused between yours dreams and reality and end up calling her at late nights. Wise men were always right. Time does heal pain. But the problem is, they were partly right. Time alone doesnt heal any pain. Its has to start with your efforts. Its time to get you back in one piece.

Enjoy singleton


Dont stop walking just bcoz you are alone. You had a gr8 time with her, why should it be any different without her? Analysis the thing you have earned from the break up? You now have loads of extra free time, coz you dont have to meet her, wait for her outside the beauty parlour,
or talk endlessly on phone.So utilize this time, watch new movies, learn some art, read books. Something constructive , dont just sit idle. You also have loads of balence on yr phone now, Call up your old frds and Granny or the ones you always wanted to talk but never had the balance on yr phone bcoz of yr ex. Your voice will make them happy... and in turn u ll be happy too..

Returning from Neverland

If She had no existence in reality at all, u wouldnt miss her! Believe this as a fact! Visit new places. Dont go to the same hangouts spots where u used to go out with her. Every new place will have new birds. Delete all her sugar coated messages , change the wallpaper,remove the speed dial from your mobile phone. Allocate these resources for other people you love but never expressed it to them. Send a sms to yr dad,mom or sibling saying how much you love them and miss them. Seems strange and embarrassing. Buts it works wonders..

RENOVATION


Change everything around you that reminds about her. Rename her on yr mobile phone. Get her First name as well as Last name. Use yr anger to find good pseudo names for her. Dumper truck, Neel Metal Fanalca , Medussa. Search for a name that brings a smile on yr face, every time you receive her call or sms. The name should related to her in some or the other way.

POWERS OF BRAIN

If you cant use renovation methods , delete her name from the contact list. Dont save her number at all. Make yr brain work everytime you want to call her. Mentally replay all your ex's bad qualities or the bad times of yr relationships. Imagine her with some extra weight, her worst hairstyle and her worst dress. Replay those first initial comments that came to yr mind but never came out of yr mouth when you were with her.Think abt this everytime before you want to make a call The fingers of temptation would surely be resisted. Always remember For every positive aspect abt your ex, there has to be an equal and opposite negative aspect abt her. So its not difficult.

SHIFT DELETE

The naughty videos and photos where she is cuddling you. The beautiful places you have visited together. One treatment for all such pic. If you are not able to gather the courage to press those two buttons. Ask yr frd to do tht for you. I am sure he would do that if he's yr best frd. Take her pic out from yr wallet. Dont think that you are Imran Hasmi from the movie Zeher and yr ex will be delighted when someday she sees the pic is still there on yr wallet. This kind of illusion will only result in losing new birds.

I AM NOT RECRUITING

"lets just stay as friends"
Ha ha ha! This is the polite and indirect way of saying you are demoted but she would still need your services. DONT SAY YES! Be a man! Stay polite and say no. Dont think this could be your chance for a second innings.. Relationships arent like Test match, they are either T20 or ODIs...
Even if she really wants it, stay firm. Tell her you are facing a recession when it comes to friends and able to give importance and time to yr present friends and thats why u arent looking for new ones. However in future you will update her for any new openings.

CHANGES IN FRIEND CIRCLE


Tell your friends not to talk about her. The past wasnt only about her alone. There are so many things they can talk about, other than you being single. Hangout with people who are stronger than you. Get inspired by them. If they can look and feel happy you can be the same. Hand out with your friends who are girls and single. Dont try anything. Just hangout.

FIRE FIGHTING

You must be burning inside. But then dont let the smoke come out.They say 'You dont realize the importance of certain things in your life until you lose them.' Thats so true when it comes to ex girlfriends. You may suddenly find yr ex more hot and attractive than ever. The reason? Girls who dump their boyfriends dont resort to smoking and booze.So stay away from it. It wont help at all. Devdas died in the end alone. No matter what Green fairy wouldnt give you the real pleasure of life. Life would be more of an illusion.

RECONSTRUCT THE FOUNDATION

Utilize the fire inside you, Join a gym, get in shape. Upload power songs like Lose yrself, Remember the name, eye of the tiger and Superman on yr ipod and hit the treadmill. And when u run dont just sing "I cant be your Superman" instead sing i would be superman for someone else. With great looking healthy body comes no great responsibilities but you may get great looking birds.

MAN AT WORK

This is the most important of all.You have been dumped, that doesnt mean you will stay Single forever. But then you should nt rush to find a new soul mate. Noone can clap with a single hand. If she dumped you, there would be reasons for it. There must be some shortcomings on yr side too. If she is a Magica De Spell then you must be Flintheart Glomgold as well. Try to find these faults on yrside. Remove them all before you hunt for a new mate. try to think the alchemist way. You are dumped once, you may not be dumped again, but if you dumped twice, you may be dumped again and again.

REVENGE

This isnt about plotting at all. Dont be a villain. " if she isnt mine she is noones " You would be really be one sick person if you think so. The best revenge in life is living a good life. So work up yrself before you find your next girlfriend. And when you find her, love her like noone has ever loved . She deserves all the happiness in her life. so dedicate yr soul for accomplishing that. That would be the ultimate revenge.But this ultimate revenge would be ultimate if u dont really mean what you are doing. She should never get the feeling that you are doing this just for a revenge against yr ex. Enjoy as couple. You should be like Ex's envy Owner's Pride


Have a happy time ahead....... :) PS :- Please pardon me girls. I dont mean to hurt any girls sentiments. I dont mean to say that only girls are bad and dump boys. There are boys who do that as well. Hope some of you may come up with a post dedicated to girls who have been dumped. Or the girls may twist some of the above mentioned points for their own good :)

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Tagged again...

Tagged by Ste



Where
is your cell phone? Computer table
Relationship? Single

Your hair? Artistic
Wo
rk? not at all
Your sister? tuition
Your favorite thing? Long drives
Your dream last night? A Normal one, thats why i dont remember what it was.. :D
Your favorite drink? Pepsi
Your dream car? Keeps changing... BMW for now
The room youre in? My room
Your fears? Elevators
What do you want to be in 10 years? A Dad
Who did you hang out with this weekend? Family
What are you not good at? Singing
One of your wish list items? Royal Enfield
Where you grew up? Banjara kind of life
Last thing you did? Black forest
What are you wearing? Towel
What aren't you wearing? everything that i am supposed to be wearing
Your pet? Wanna have a White mouse.
Your computer? Assembled
Your life? Smooth
Your mood? Orangee
Missing? Old days
What are you thinking about right now? Have to take bath soon..
Your kitchen? reminds me of food
Your summer? stay inside home
Your favorite color? Orange
Last time you laughed? when i sang "I am Henry the eight i am,"
Last time you cried? when i had a bad dream.
School? was good.
Love? i am a Narcissist.


Now any1 who reads this tag is supposed to do this tag.... :D

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

MADZ tag

I cant get any thing inside my mind....
I hope this tag from amds brings something out of my mind


1. I've come to realize that my last kiss.....was a confusion :P

2. I am listening to... Cant help falling in love by Elvis

3. I talk... when i really want to talk

4. I love... Some people and things in my life

5. My best friends.. are in good health.

6. My first real kiss... made someone cry.... :D

7. Love is... a treasure that u ll get somehow

8. Marriage is... presently a threat to my lifestyle

9. Somewhere, someone is thinking... how to end this recession and all.... :D

10. I'll always... brush my teeth before washing my face

11. The last time I really cried was because... When I got a horrible dream

12. My cell phone.. is having no camera, still i love it...

13. When i wake up in the morning... people around me are surprised

14. Before I go to bed... its usually morning again

15. Right now I am thinking about... What movie should i watch...

16. Babies are... cute and adorable

17. I miss... some ppl in my life

18. Today I.. will go out and buy some pepsi and khadya padhart(edible items)

19. Tom I will ... try to finish it all...

20. I really want to be able to... catch chicks soon.. not the girls... the real chicks.. i was champion when i was young somehow i forgot the art.... :P

I specially tag the mystery girl Danica K, and whoever wants to be tagged...

Saturday, July 18, 2009

YAPPY B'DAY AJAY!



Alright we have a bday again.This time its the Mumbai boy -Ajay Bhondve. He is turning 22 today according to official sources. The real age is still a mystery although the hairloss program almost blew his cover... :DI wish him a very happy birthday. Dude! may god bless you with all happiness... I wish u loads of fun and good luck. And yes Drink heavily and make the taxi or Auto wallas drive responsibly.Once you reach yr home.. dont go and talk with everyone... or open yr mouth. go to yr bed and sleep.. that will make yr happy bday even more happy...

Now the time for gifts....
there's no cake for you from my side.I bet you ll get loads of them....
So here i am sending you the thing which is most important for BE. like us..:D


Pick the one u like the most or drink each one of them.... :D

I even called Vijay Mallya... he said he is very happy with yr annual beer consumption and has a gift for u...

Here's the snap shot of the press conference held in bangalore...


I end this post with a song thats dedicated to you. Its called the Nowhere man by the Beatles... Hope this year you learn from the Nowhere Man and find out what you are missing in yourself and come out as a winner... also the second song is the bday song...
Enjoy and have a gr8 bday....

Cheers... ooops i broke the mug..... :D :D :D



Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Birthday time!!

All right!!! Its 14th July 2009.Now a special thing I would like to do today is come up with a blog post dedicated to the freakiest though cutest little frd of mine -Shreya! This girl is turning 15 today.So what a special day it is. Wish u a very very happy birthday girl! Wish u have loads of fun today.May the Almighty bless u with all the happiness and joy.Wish you loads of love,luck and no lust at all :P..... Dont be a bad girl but yes u can be a good bat girl..(vampire :D)


The song on my blog is dedicated only to you.I hope u like it... :)
Here's a Collage I made for u. Hope u like it :) U can even see my shadow there in one of those pics... :D ... No prizes for guessing it correctly





Here's a cake with fifteen candles on it for you.I agree that its not finger lickin good... but yes i am loving it... :D and hope u love it too... :)




I finally end this post with a birthday song sung by some orange men. Plz forgive me and them..I did tell them yr name.... but they forgot.... One bad teacher and three bad students... :D
And yes do use the pause option for the Ninja Song player on the right sidebar.

video

Last but not the least i send a big hug to you on yr birthday.
Wish u a happy birthday again... have fun... :)

Cake Stolen from!

Video mugged from!


PS: Plz excuse me me if i have spelled birthday wrong. If i can pronounce it wrongly then i might spell it incorrectly too.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Dentists vs Doctors!

All Dentists are doctors,but not all doctors are Dentists! Why is this? Why are they not just Dentists? They are no where close to what the doctors in making study? The Doctors study two Bs with a M and S. Thats how we get MBBS...they study to become masters.Why they become masters? Because they handle two girlfriends/boyfriends and still remain a bachelor.
Bachelor of medicine and Bachelor of surgery. While on the other hand the dentists study BDS.
Only one thing to handle.

I think there must have been some kind of a scam.Long long time ago in a Kingdom far far away there must have been some kind of a trickery. Now this Kingdom must be famous for its medical knowledge. One famous Doctor in that kingdom hated to look at other people's mouth and thought the same shouldnt happen with his kids. So he must have spoken to the dumb king and forced him to announce a division of medical sciences. Doctors who expertise in dental region. But then he was afraid that they may become more famous than the usual doctors, so he told the king that these people no matter what they study and what they do they will continue to be called as doctors. And thats how it all must have begun.Over the period of time the scam was forgotten by all the people and the doctors were happy with the dentist being known as doctors.


But then one small section among the dentists never forgot the injustice.They formed a secret society and planned revenge.They tried hard to come out of the doctor's dogma.They formed their own association,tried to tell the world about themselves through TV ADs.Remember the pepsodent and colgate ads.These are secret and indirect ways to tell the world that look we are different from the doctors.We have our own association IDA! We are dentists after all!And then the biggest clue of all-The dentist's chair. Go to any doctor, they will either make you sit on a chair or make you lie down on a bed and then start the treatment. But the dentist decided to be different.They wanted to be different from what the doctors are doing. they must have thought they will not do what the doctors are doing.They must have kept their patients standing all the time while performing the treatment.But then some ingenious person must have come up with the dentist's chair. The benchmark of all inventions for the dentists. You neither sit on that or lie completely, its somewhere in between what the doctors make you do. Its different.

So the secret war between the dentists and the doctors continues for their seperate indentity.
I hope the dentists win....Wish them all the best.

PS:- excuse me for my views...I love all doctors,i love all dentists!

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Law goes gay....

Girls smooching girls,boys giving hugs and kisses to other boys.Cheering and posing happily in front of the television cameras. Its all happening after Delhi High Court took some 57 years to find out that section 377 of the Indian Penal Code is violative of fundamental rights.So now this 149 year old law is no more punishable.Though all this is going to bring more entertaining news on certain news channels. Two boys elope from one village to get married , Top Telugu actor xyz's daughter runs away with her girlfriend to tie the rope ,Taxi driver rapes a foreign male national and etc.

Well this may be of concern to only a few people who would be associated directly.This new development has brought smiles only to the faces of homosexuals. The other league must be worried, especially the male(straight) community. We already faced a tough time finding the right girl, now the girls have one more legal option as their lifepartner-Another girl. This would be a double blow for us. We dont lose a single girl but we lose two girls for every legal homosexual relationship.

Another matter of concern is the homosexual community's needs to spread its league.They will hunt down for new people.They were always on the hunt for new recruits for their league,but that was a covert missiona nd their groth was slow.Now they have a new tool,they are stronger now. They have the law with themselves." Join us now,We are now legal" that would be their punch line.India was always unsafe for women, now it would be unsafe for men too.

Now the biggest concern.With great powers,comes great responsibilties and with great laws becoming unpunishable comes greater ways to extort money. Getting bachelor accomodation was always a problem. It will be get worse. You have to find a roommate who is really a true friend.A person whom you can trust.If you dont find such a person as your roommate then i would suggest dont pose for photographs with such people. Someday that pic may be used against you. They could end up suing you claiming palimony for deciet in a homosexual relationship,which actually never existed. God save us all.Hope Lord Macualay's soul still rest in peace.



PS: I dont mean to hurt anyone's sentiments. I was just thinking about the ways me and some of my friends would get affected by the recent developements...

Thursday, June 25, 2009

The occasions !


More: Life!!!! Return home and find my friends boozing!
Samir: Sorry buddy its ' The occasion '! Join us! Its yr home!
More: Na... I dont feel for it, whats the occasion?
Spiky: Samir got a new girlfriend!
More: hehe! Congrats! I ll join for the next occasion 2 weeks from now.
Chorus(Spiky and Samir): Next??
More: You know what i mean.. the start and the end Samir & GF... :D

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The elevator...





Spiky:
yallow.... whts up buddy?
More:
U have to pick me from KD bhai's home..
Spiky: where's that?
More: E 101, Sardar nagar....
Spiky: what happened yr bike broke down again?? wait a sec..are u mad?get into the
elevator and press 7.

More: no i cant... u have to come.. i cant climb up the stairs..
Spiky: are boozed up?
More: yes...... and i am Claustrophobic..
Spiky: ooops..here i come!

Friday, May 22, 2009

The phone!

Samir and More Orangee came back to More's apartment.More's Cellphone was stolen again.It happens all the time with him.This time Samir was to be blamed.He was the last known person to have it.

Orangee: I cant believe this! How can this happen again and again with me!

Samir: Well! it happens buddy...it happens..

Orangee: how could you leave the phone there at the sofa!

Samir: Well it wasnt feeling comfortable inside my pocket,and besides we were just two at the CCD,so I thought yr cellphone could get the extra seat beside me.

Orangee: So I shouldnt blame you, i should blame my cellphone which didnt signal us while we were leaving.Right?

Samir: Yup! you are right! I think it loved that place,the air-conditioned environment,the music,the girls.We were just a bunch of broing boys.It deserves that place.

Spiky enters the scene,smoking his fake cuban cigar!

Spiky: what happened? you look pissed off?

Orangee: Somebody stole my phone from CCD!

Spiky: Hmmm...wow! So we ll have a treat when u buy a new cellphone.Who stole it?

Orangee: I dont know! Somebody did it. We went back there, But i could find it.What should i do now? Go file an FIR at the police station?

Samir: What will they do?Its gone!

Orangee:Ya ya! You are right,Maybe i should call Vodafone care,block my SIM.

Spiky: Maybe you should call your phone!

Samir: Yes! we never tried doing that!Come on dial the number!

Orangee: Al right! lets give it a shot!

callertune playing-
He's a real nowhere man,
Sitting in his nowhere land,
Making all his nowhere plans
For nobody.
Doesn't have a point of view,
Knows not where he's going to,

stranger: Hello!
Orangee whipers-Its a girl!!!

Orangee: Hello! is this 9978456781?

Stranger: i have no idea abt that?

Orangee:Can ask you some questions?

Stranger:Ya sure!

Orangee: is this yr cellphone?

Stranger:No its not..

Orangee:Did you steal this phone from CCD today?

Stranger: yes i did!

Orangee:You did it...?? But its my cellphone..

Stranger: I didnt know it was yrs.

Spiky and samir could believe what they were hearing on the speaker phone.

Orangee: What are you going to do with my cellphone.

Stranger: Well i dont know! listen to songs, take pictures or sell it.

Orangee: Plz can i have it back??

Stranger: No i dont think so.

Spiky started waving his hands.he wanted to talk with this girl.Orangee handed the reciever to him.

Spiky:Hello!

Stranger:Ya hello! who's this?

Spiky: Its me Spiky! There are some good forward messages in his inbox,could you plz forward it to my number? its 99784001917!

Stranger: Hello Spiky!Ya sure i ll forward them.

Spiky: And dont worry! Its a postpaid connection! No worries with the balance and all.And also there are some phone numbers and picture of girls in his phone.Most of them are my girlfriends So plz mail them to me. spiky1917@gmail.com ! will you??

Stranger: No problems! I ll do that!

Spiky: Ya thanks a lot girl! Here I give it back to Orangee...

Samir graps the phone from Spiky,

Samir: Hello!

Stranger: Hello Orangee!

Samir: No its me Samir!

Stranger: hello Samir! whats up??

Samir: Wow u have a sweet voice!Can i have yr phone number?

Stranger: Sure! ask Orangee, he knows it....

The call is disconnected!

May be continued! :D

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Refrigerator :- The forgotten mother


I've come to the conclusion that there are certain things in your life that play a very vital role in keeping your life comfortable. The irony is that we dont even think about them, forget about realizing their importance.The refrigerator is one such thing in our life.I guess everyone who reads this post would have a refrigerator at their home.

In modern world,the refrigerator is like the mother earth for all forms of foods.Be it dairy products,meat,vegetables,fruits or cold drinks and other hard drinks.It protects them,provides them an environment where they can live longer and breath fresh air and hang out comfortably. So when it does this it helps us too.Coz we want it to behave in that way.The better it plays this role,the more satisfied we are.

We dont have break up with only people.We also have them with the food that we eat.How many times it has happened while watching TV and gulping down that bottle of pepsi when u feel that "I have had enough of that pepsi..I cant take it...I am breaking off..." But there's still something in that bottle thats attracts you and u dont pour it down the sink. When yr neighbour sends home-made gulab jamuns just after u finish yr dinner, U know that u cant have more of them but still care for it.You want those gulab jamuns to stay near u for a longer time.Thats when the Refrigerator comes handy.You stuff all the left overs. So that u can spend time with those food later on.The poor refrigerator never complains.It accepts them with a wide open door.

So because of the refrigerator, what you can have is two life forms of matter that sometimes don't really ever want to be together, and the Refrigerator is like this relationship support system that keeps these strange,Stomachful relationships between humans and food alive.Not only this, it has to listen to those gossips that may happen inside it.The various food stuffs that boast abt who is the most fresh among all,who's got the most nutrition value and what not.It has to listen to these talks.What these innocent food item dont realize is that al of them are goin to be punished and they are goin to hell.This is the place where they should live in harmony.Some of them would be cut into some pieced, fried with oil or boiled.And then they will finally enter the human digestive system where various acids would be poured on them and make the shit out of them.

Humans are not just making a hole in the mother earth's ozone layer,They do that with the refrigerator too.Every time u dont close its doors properly u let the harmful heatwaves to enter its atmosphere. It still tries its best to maintain the atmosphere inside it work hard and take a big load on it compressor heart and you blame it for yr big electricity bill.And once something happens to it, you go mad.You call everywhere,trying to find someone who can bring it to life again. You yell at the serviceman when he come late. You realize that u cant live with the refrigerator.Your kitchen seems to be more spacious bcoz of the refrigerator's absence but it doesnt make you happy.You want the serviceman to fix it fast.The summers get more hotter.Life is never like the way it was.And when it finally returns you forget everything and settle down with the usual way of life.


It never sleeps.Its sole purpose is to keep u happy and it works right from day one when it steps into yr house.Occasionally it gets rest when there's a powercut or when u decide to empty it and switch it off before u go for yr vacation. Who else serve's you this way?Only your refrigerator works and works for you as you eat and keep your stomach full.So the next time when u open the doors of your fridge,give it a bear hug and a kiss,i am sure its machine heart would miss a heart beat... :P :)

Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Insurance assurance !

My god is it yr bike that's parked outside the apartment?

I came out of the kitchen to confirm the source of the query. Yes it was Shania, as usual she did nt ring the doorbell.

"Does it still resemble a bike?"
i replied back.

My god! its yrs,how did it happen? when did it happen are you alright??


relax baby,I am superman,the man of steel !

man of steel ???what happened to the orange theory???

ooh that is still valid,I was nt there in the scene of action when my bike face that atrocity.
Then how did it happen??


























Well if u could plz enter that room you can see the man of the moment Mr Samir.

Shania
move
s into the room..

Samir
? why did he take yr bike?ooh my god! are you ok Samir?

Samir had a fractured left hand and some bruises scattered over his body like a natural art.He was a spectacular piece of natural wonder. I had no idea how and why he was alive and that too in my apartment.Interestingly Samir managed to get up from the bed and say hi to Shania.

Hi Shania! I am ok...just some minor things...I am alright..I am alright...he he..

Ya the minor things have so far cost ed over 1500 bucks...just for the hospital and misc expenses.



what abt the bike? What are you going to do abt that?You have insurance right?

ha ha ha...The insurance..ha ha ha....


What?? what makes you laugh??

Baby!! its a police case now.....Some one has filed a FIR against this respectable man.He doesnt have a driving license.The insurance company wont pay my bills after going thru that FIR report.

Hey buddy! listen i am sorry..I thought that they will run out of stock..That was the reason i was driving rash..

what are you guys talking abt?

Hmm nothing....he's just... he's just gone crazy after the accident.

Shania was puzzled.

They were giving away free samples of Minute maid pulpy orange,So he sent me and this happened.Hey orangee look i am sorry...

I dont blame you,I blame myself.

ooh no blame me...i am the one responsible for this....blame me...

ok i blame you....its you.

How can you blame him?You gave him the bike.You wanted to have those free sample of pulpy orange.che!!! so cheap !!

Alright!! alright!! ceasefire,ceasefire.its over its over..there's no point blaming each other.

I went back to the kitchen and started preparing my cheese toast.Meanwhile Shania went to the balcony so that she can have a proper look of my battered bike.She could stop smiling. And not just a plain smile.It was the "you know i told you very well but you never listened to me" kind of a smile. Damn! I was very angry on Samir.Why the hell did he tell abt the freebie.It was so trivial.He didnt drive properly.

I told you that one day yr lust for oranges would cost you very high...and see it has happened.

he he...I was nt lustful abt the juice. I was only helping those college gals finish off their part time work
quickly so that they can go home. The cute yet hardworking SIET college gals ,centre of chennai near T nagar.They had sacrified so much of their white complex,facing the summer heat under the merge shadow of a tent.

Funny very funny! So how were the girls related to you....how did you know abt the freebie offer?

ha ha...ha ha...See thats me..It happens all the time...You wont understand.

So what are you soing to do abt the bike?

lol ! its all been taken care of.... lol

how is that possible?? what abt the FIR?

see i ll tell you how..An old langotiya yaar of mine whom u know as Spiky AKA Col. Ivanod Spigot has been spending the past few month outside that college.As a result of that he's now dating a girl who's dad is a highly placed official in the police department of chennai.And as we speak at this very special moment of history,Spiky has asked the gal to help me out of this case.And she has assured us that the matter is well under the expertise of her beloved dad.

Ooh now i understand why did you say that the gals from SIET are cute and hardworking...Well why is she doing this....??

I have no idea. she's doing it thats all i want to know...

I tell you Shania, Its love... The girl is mad abt our Spiky.

Ok so that makes some sense....

The doorbell rang.I said who's that? the answer came "its me Spiky" We all answered in chorus " come on in"

Yeh! there he is, My saviour,The boy himself,boyfriend of the moment and year Col. Ivanod Spigot aka Spiky....here i am wrongly accused for genocide,rape and extortion and been sentenced to death penalty and my nearest and dearest friend is dating the president of India. how's that?

Orangee..leave yr stupid talks.... Let me tell you what did i accomplish today..do you remember Richa from our school. I was mad behind her. remember???

Ya , the one who used to cry when she saw wall lizard on class room walls???

yup u got it....I saw her in city centre...and she recognised me.... and we talked for a while and she said that she wants to get back with me.

Go on...
( i was fearing the worst)

Ya thats when sheela came and she saw Richa going out.She spotted me with her. She asked whats going on. I told her that she's my long lost school day lover who wants to get back with me.

Sheela that new girl right??

ya ya....and now i was thinking what should i do? how would i tell her and console her. She asked me to speak the truth. And i said I am gonna get back with Richa.

What??? we all shouted in chorus.


what happened to the FIR and the out of the court dealing?
what FIR ,Court?? ooops i forgot abt that..


What the hell? My bike has been battered by that Mahindra scorpio and i want an insurance claim....

oooh dont worry,she ll still do it for you...infact she ll still do it for me..

Why why she ll do it? you dumped her...you idiot you dumped her...

No no...I consoled her before i did.... no i said that i am going to get back with richa.

That means the same idiot, U dumped her. My bike it gone.....It will die bcoz of those wounds. Somebody file a FIR on that Scorpio.it has assaulted my bike...

Relax Orangee! Its just an Yezdi roadking.people used to throw stones at you when u used to cross thier locality on that bike.Killing people who are already going to die isn't actually a crime. Yr bike has attained salvation from its earthy services.Ram Naam satya hae!


Shania and samir went to the balcony and started reciting....
Our Father ,who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name,
thy kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven...........
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